One step forward, two steps back

Just a quick little update on how I’m faring in this journey. I’ve had so many people that I’ve run into in person ask me so I figured I would update all of you. Things have been going fairly well. By fairly I mean–one day is good,the next day is a challenge.

Please understand me: I am not being too hard on myself. I am being honest with myself. I have succeeded with flying colors some days while others have been a complete disaster. But the thing is: I didn’t get myself here in a day. I’m not going to fix myself in a day either. It’s a huge learning process and it takes a lot of time to retrain yourself to consistently make good decisions rather than decisions of convenience.

So there it is. I feel like this is a fairly normal part of the journey. You go one step forward and then sometimes take two steps backward. The important part is I am still trying. I know that I will succeed eventually, not from my own efforts but through the grace of God. I thank Him that this is my greatest struggle right now, which is mild in comparison to the hellish circumstances many others are in.

We also pray that you will be strengthened with all his glorious power so you will have all the endurance and patience you need. May you be filled with joy, always thanking the Father. He has enabled you to share in the inheritance that belongs to his people, who live in the light. (‭Colossians‬ ‭1‬:‭11-12‬ NLT)

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